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I Love You and Thank You

It's been three months since Michael died. When The Beautiful One returned from her last visit with him and his devoted life partner Jody, she knew much more intimately the . . . [Read More]

Unruly Books: Is Home Your Happy Place? (June)

We are going to read my book Is Home Your Happy Place? together. I know, I know. How exciting might it be to read a book about clutter? Well, it's not . . . [Read More]

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Unruly Rants

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There was this piece of me—a young, vulnerable, desperate piece of me—who begged for someone to finally just tell me who the hell I was supposed to be, or do, or what my life was supposed to be about. Every time life intensified, waves of hysteria would swell from deep within me, the fear that I’d get it wrong… that I couldn’t trust myself to know what was true for me. I felt terrified that, without external guidance, my life would be wasted.

But then I started to explore what one of my early teachers called “the spirituality of the self”. I studied the way I reacted to the world around me, the way I allowed certain relationships, circumstances, and experiences to affect me. I learned I was powerful, far more powerful than I’d ever imagined, and that I could change reality by changing the way I was showing up in the world. In time, I released what no longer served me and made space for my truth to become my life. The artist, the lover, the priestess, the mother, the healer, the dancer, the writer . . . one discovery at a time, I hosted a reunion of the pieces of my soul.

This transformation was possible because of the supports I cultivated for myself along the way.  My blog is an extension of my journals. I use it to share the lessons I’ve learned, powerful resources, and inspiring stories of my clients’ transformations. Dig in and find the information and inspiration you need today and keep coming back when you need another dose! If you can’t find what you’re looking for, email me your question and I’ll see what I can find for you.

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January 16, 2014

Mind Games: Imagine Your Worst-Case Scenario

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There are many, many ways to shift our thinking. Some of them happen to us and others we choose to use to replace old ways of being with new, more useful ways of being. For fun, I call the ones we choose to use mind games and I’m going to share them with you as part of the daily inspirational treasures published here at Camp Christy. These are very powerful tools and I hope you’ll add them to your greenhouse for later. (Or now, I suppose, if you’re having that kind of day.)

In any given scary or overwhelming situation, take a moment to imagine your worst-case scenario.  

  • Someone tells you no.
  • You fail the assignment or class.
  • You don’t lose the weight.
  • You lose the house.
  • You get fired.
  • You find a lump in your breast.

How bad can it be? Take time to imagine the least favorable outcomes for this situation. What would you do? How would you deal with it? How would it make you feel?

The worst-case scenario mind game helps us imagine what we might actually have to face if we don’t get done what we are trying to get done. Usually, there are physical world considerations (money, time, etc.) but also there is an emotional fall out that we are trying to find a way to avoid. And that surge of emotions we are (pointlessly) trying to avoid isn’t just about the situation at hand, it’s calling forth all of the similar untended emotional baggage from the past.

I’ve always said that rock bottom is little more than a solid place to stand. So, let’s really look at what’s possible here. Poke at your potential crisis and get to know what’s on the line for you. Imagine yourself living out that situation. Really lean into the way that this particular outcome would make you feel. Take a few deep breaths and really feel it.

Have you got it? Good. Now, think about how far your willing to go to keep that from happening.

  • Ask someone else to buy your art.
  • Do your damn homework.
  • Go for a walk instead numbing out with sweets.
  • Stop spending on the credit cards.
  • Step up your performance at work or update your resume.
  • Find out if it’s breast cancer, and if it is… fight for your life with every resource at your disposal.

Almost every time, I’ve found that the generalized, unexplored fear is more terrifying than the true emotions that taking action. Think of the situation which weighs heavy on your heart right now. Imagine the worst case scenario. Is it really so unbearable? Is it so scary that you will refuse to move? What can you do to keep it from happening? How far will you go? What will inaction cost you? Are you willing to pay that toll?

Ben Raynal via Flickr
As always, if you need support, I’m here.